Monday, February 12, 2018

Fastnacht Day 2018

I'm actually remembering to make this post the day before Fastnach Day this year, as a reminder for people to stop at the grocery store on the way home to pick up what they'll need to make fastnachts tomorrow morning.

Now, there's a good chance you don't know what fastnachts are. Since I'm lazy and have already written about fastnachts before, I'm just going to straight up copy my post from last year (well, with a handful of tiny edits).

You may call Fastnacht Day something else like Mardi Gras or Fat Tuesday, but if you grew up in the same part of Pennsylvania as me, it's definitely Fastnacht Day (pronounced foss-not*). Fastnachts are more or less a potato based donut. They're a Pennsylvania Dutch tradition** (meaning it was originally a German tradition) to use up all the fat and sugar and before starting the Lenten fast. We even got them in school lunches when I was in elementary school (and I'd suspect they still do). Well, I don't do the traditional fast anymore, but I definitely keep up with a tradition of making good food.

If you want to try making them yourself, just stop on the way home from work to buy the ingredients you'll need (because I'm guessing you don't keep buttermilk in the fridge), and make a batch. Here's the recipe my family uses:

Here are a couple pictures from when my daughter and I made them last year (we had to wake up pretty early). Since we were running a little late, everybody was grabbing fastnachts to take with them before they were all done, so I didn't get a picture of the entire completed double batch.

Alex Cutting the Fastnachts Frying Up the Fastnachts

And to give an idea of how popular fastnachts are in that part of Pennsylvania, here are a few articles from local newspapers up that way, along with the Wikipedia entry.

So go get yourself a fastnact tomorrow. If you're not near Pennsylvania Dutch country and don't feel like making them yourself, at least go buy yourself a cake donut and pretend it's a fastnacht.


*The original German is a bit different. In fact, a German coworker said they were called fasnachtk├╝chle where he was from in Germany, but I couldn't pronounce it. Though I have other German friends from a different part of Germany, and they'd never heard of the tradition. So I guess it's regional in Germany, too.

**Just to be clear, Pennsylvania Dutch is not synonymous with Amish and Mennonite. Granted, the Amish and Mennonites still stick to Pennsylvania Dutch traditions the strongest, especially in still speaking the language, but there were/are lots of other Pennsylvania Dutch people.

One More Darwin Day Link

Ape Skeletons

I just came across this article by Scott Solomon, so I thought I'd pass it on:

If you recall, Scott wrote the recent book, Future Humans, so he's in a good position to discuss recent human evolution. Go see what he had to say for Darwin Day.

Image Source: Houston Chronicle

Happy Darwin Day 2018

Darwin's BirthdayToday is Darwin Day, the 209th anniversary of Charles Darwin's birth. To reuse the same thing I've written for a few years now (origianlly here), Charles Darwin was "the man who presented evolution in such a way and with sufficient evidence that it became obvious that it was the explanation for how life developed on this planet. Others had ideas of transmutation before Darwin, and Alfred Russel Wallace even came up with a theory of natural selection very similar to Darwin's at around the same time, so it's apparent that humanity would have eventually recognized how evolution works. But Darwin's genius in presenting all the evidence for evolution in the way he did certainly gave the field a huge head start."

Although Darwin Day this year isn't getting anywhere the same attention as the bicentennial of Darwin's birth a few years ago, there are still Darwin Day events at various locations. If you want to see if there's anything near you, you can check out the list of events at DarwinDay.org. (I checked there and local calendars, but couldn't find anything for today in Wichita Falls.)

To celebrate Darwin Day on this site, I just posted a new entry today giving a concrete example of speciation:

Since the last Darwin Day, I've also created a section on this site highlighting some of my better writings on evolution, as a starting point for people who may not understand it very well. There are actually several entries there that are new since Darwin Day last year, so go check it out.

And here are a couple more entries I've written about Darwin that are appropriate for today.

Finally, here are links to external sites with good information about Darwin and evolution. The first is brand new this year, the next two are from the bicentennial celebration a few years ago, and the last is just a classic that's been around for years.

  • Oxford University Press - Darwin Day 2018 A great collection of links to articles and resources about Darwin.
  • Nature's Darwin 200 The prestigious journal has put together a collection of articles, editorials, news stories, and various other essays and features that have to do with evolution in general or Darwin in particular.
  • American Museum of Natural History's Darwin page Yet another good collection of information. This is from the exhibit that ran in the museum from 2005 to 2006.
  • The TalkOrigins Archive Has a bit more focus on the creation/evolution controversy rather than just straight science, and hasn't really had too many recent updates, but it is still very, very informative.

Evolution in Action - The Ongoing Speciation Event of Apple Maggot Flies

This entry is part of a collection on Understanding Evolution. For other entries in this collection, follow that link.


Apple Maggot FlyA little while ago, I came across a question on Quora, When gorillas and humans split from their common ancestor was there a 'new' individual of each new species born at that time?. Since other people had already discussed human evolution specifically, I decided to go with a more concrete example of an ongoing speciation event happening before our very eyes. Here's that answer, slightly edited.

---

I'm going to give a concrete example - apple maggot flies. A few hundred years ago, there were no apple maggot flies, because there were no apples in the Americas. Apples weren't brought to the Americas until the 17th century. Now, there were obviously other types of trees and fruits in the Americas before that, and different types of insects that fed on them. One type of fruit bearing tree was the hawthorne, which was fed upon by hawthorne flies. You can probably see where this is heading.

Once Europeans brought apple trees to the Americas, there was a whole new potential food source for these flies. Some time in the early 1800s, some hawthorne flies began eating apples. They were still the same species as their relatives that ate hawthornes, without any drastic differences. They just had a few mutations that made them preferentially seek out apples as opposed to hawthornes. If anyone had put them in close contact with flies that still ate hawthornes, they wouldn't have had any trouble breeding.

Well, as the years went by, the flies that preferred apples began to get more and more distant from their hawthorne eating relatives. For one, since they were physically on apple trees more often than hawthornes, they mated more often with other apple eating flies. And since apples ripen earlier than hawthornes, the apple eating flies timed their emergence from their pupae to occur earlier in the year, introducing a separation in time, as well (obviously, this timing was based on genetic mutations, not conscious choice by the flies). Since each group of flies was more likely to mate with flies that ate the same type of fruit, any mutations that were appearing in the two different groups were more likely to remain in that particular group, and not be shared with the other group. So, the populations of apple maggot flies and hawthorne flies have been growing more genetically distinct.

Today, they are still classified as the same species, because flies from one group can still mate with flies from the other group to produce fertile offspring. But those hybrid offspring are less likely to survive because they'll have a mix of genetics from their parents, making them less specialized for eating either hawthornes or apples. The hybrids aren't completely doomed to dying without mating themselves, but because their chances are lower than non-hybrids, it further reduces the the gene flow between the two populations. If things continue as they are, these two populations will probably end up becoming two distinct species.

That's how speciation occurs. It's not something that occurs over a single generation. It's a process that takes many generations to complete. And the two incipient species are initially very similar. It's only many, many generations later, once each lineage has had a chance to evolve independently, that the two species start to show bigger differences.

---

To answer the original Quora question regarding human evolution, millions of years ago when a certain population of apes gave rise to two different lineages - one that would eventually give rise to gorillas, and the other that would eventually give rise to chimps, bonobos, and us, it would have occurred in much the same way. At first there were two populations that were still the same species but just separated somehow. Once separated, they acquired unique mutations in each lineage. Eventually, many generations later, they were two distinct populations that could no longer interbreed - two separate, but closely related and very similar species. Only that speciation event would have taken longer than the current ongoing hawthorne/apple maggot fly event, because generations in apes are much longer than those of fruit flies.

---

More Info:

Image Source: Wikipedia


Want to learn more about evolution? Find more at Understanding Evolution

Friday, February 9, 2018

Response to Email - The New Lord's Prayer

Praying HandsI recently received the type of chain email that I couldn't resist responding to. It was titled "new Lord's prayer....awesome", but it was really a play on Now I Lay Me Down to Sleep, not the Lord's Prayer. At any rate, it was all about how students supposedly aren't allowed to express themselves religiously in schools any more (and for good measure it threw in some of the sinful things they are allowed to do).

Just to give a taste, here is the first stanza of the poem. The full email can be found below the fold.

Now I sit me down in school
Where praying is against the rule
For this great nation under God
Finds mention of Him very odd

This poem simply doesn't reflect the law. Here's an article from the Washington Post explaining the issues:
Can students pray in public schools? Can teachers say 'Merry Christmas'? What's allowed -- and what's forbidden.

For something more official, here's the guidance from the U.S. Department of Education:
Guidance on Constitutionally Protected Prayer in Public Elementary and Secondary Schools

In fact, here's a short excerpt from the DoE page:

The Supreme Court has repeatedly held that the First Amendment requires public school officials to be neutral in their treatment of religion, showing neither favoritism toward nor hostility against religious expression such as prayer. Accordingly, the First Amendment forbids religious activity that is sponsored by the government but protects religious activity that is initiated by private individuals, and the line between government-sponsored and privately initiated religious expression is vital to a proper understanding of the First Amendment's scope. As the Court has explained in several cases, "there is a crucial difference between government speech endorsing religion, which the Establishment Clause forbids, and private speech endorsing religion, which the Free Speech and Free Exercise Clauses protect."

In shorter terms, teachers, principals, and other government employees can't push religion while on the clock and representing the government (though they're free to do so on their own time), while students are perfectly free to exercise their religious rights, including praying or reading the Bible.

Invariably, there will be isolated incidents of schools not understanding the law and restricting students' rights, but these are usually curtailed pretty quickly. Multiple examples can be found on the ACLU's website. It's just that cases of government employees overstepping the law by improperly endorsing religion are far more common than government employees overstepping the law by restricting the free practice of religion.
ACLU Defense of Religious Practice and Expression in Public Schools

I'd also note that events like See You at the Pole are not rare. You can go to their Facebook page to see photos of students from all across the country gathering to pray on school campuses. Here are some photos specifically from Old High here in Wichita Falls. And here's a photo from my high school Alma mater up in 'liberal' Maryland. And on a personal level, at all of the high school graduations I've been to in recent years for nieces, nephews, family friends, and my daughter, there's always been at least one student speech religious in nature or including a prayer.

Finally, here's an open letter from an evangelical Christian as food for thought (on World Net Daily of all places), Why I'm Against Pre-Game Prayers. Basically, he was in a community where Buddhism was the predominant religion, so a Buddhist prayer was recited at the Friday night high school football game. It gave him a completely different perspective on what it's like to not be part of the majority religion when prayers are offered at public school events.

Image Source: Wikimedia

Continue reading "Response to Email - The New Lord's Prayer" »

Friday, February 2, 2018

Friday Trump & Politics Roundup - 21

Donald TrumpThis is my semi-regular feature to post links to articles about Donald Trump along with excerpts from those articles. Trump has the potential to cause so much damage to our country and the world that it's every citizen's responsibility to keep pressure on him and our other elected officials to try to minimize the damage. To read previous entries in this series and other Trump related posts, check out my Trump archives.

It's been a little while since I've done one of these posts because, quite frankly, it's so damned disheartening. Every time I review politics and see all the damage being done to the United States, I get depressed and worried for the future. And today, as in literally just an hour or two ago, we see a corrupt President trying very hard to discredit the very agency that could investigate him. And it's working. Republican trust in the FBI is down 22 points since 2015 (source).

Here's a good article discussing Trump's feud with the FBI, followed by a scary excerpt.

"Unprecedented": 9 historians on why Trump's war with the FBI is so stunning

Yes, the independence of the FBI is under siege. Bringing an independent judiciary and investigative branch under the domination of the executive is one of the first moves of regimes that do not respect the rule of law. Pinochet's Chile. Nazi Germany. The Soviet Union. Putin's Russia.

The rationale is simple. Besides the military, the judiciary and law enforcement branches are the most powerful in a state. Control and politicization of that wing allows the ruler to criminalize his opponents, to label them enemies of the state, when in fact those so-called enemies are really defenders of a more viable, democratic nation. That is why they are a threat.


One of the scariest things is actually a few months old by now, summed up succinctly in the headline itself:

Washington Post - In a new poll, half of Republicans say they would support postponing the 2020 election if Trump proposed it

Half of Republicans would actually support postponing an election if Donald Trump called for it. That is absolutely outrageous. That is exactly the type of thing the despots and dictators do, and here in the United States of America, we have half of the members of the party in power supporting such a gross violation of democratic principles.


Here's another article to do nothing to reassure you, also followed with a few excerpts:

Vox - How democracies die, explained: The problems in American democracy run far deeper than Trump.

Demagogues and authoritarians do not destroy democracies. It's established political parties, and the choices they make when faced with demagogues and authoritarians, that decide whether democracies survive.

"2017 was the best year for conservatives in the 30 years that I've been here," Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell said this week. "The best year on all fronts. And a lot of people were shocked because we didn't know what we were getting with Donald Trump."

The best year on all fronts. Think about that for a moment. If you want to know why congressional Republicans are opening an assault on the FBI in order to protect Trump, it can be found in that comment. This was a year in which Trump undermined the press, fired the director of the FBI, cozied up to Russia, baselessly alleged he was wiretapped, threatened to jail his political opponents, publicly humiliated his attorney general for recusing himself from an investigation, repeatedly claimed massive voter fraud against him, appointed a raft of unqualified and occasionally ridiculous candidates to key positions, mishandled the aftermath of the Puerto Rico hurricane, and threatened to use antitrust and libel laws against his enemies.

And yet McConnell surveyed the tax cuts he passed and the regulations he repealed and called this not a mixed year for his political movement, not a good year for his political movement, but the best year he'd ever seen.

How Democracies Die contains quite a bit about Trump, but it is largely what we already know: Trump has authoritarian instincts -- indeed, he checks every box on a test of authoritarian leaders -- but thus far, he has lacked the discipline and the institutional capacity to upend American democracy.
What if, instead of a louche, undisciplined, boorish, and insulting demagogue, Trump were a smooth, calculating, strategic, and disciplined demagogue? What if it were not Trump who had won the 2016 Republican presidential nomination, but John Kelly -- a four-star general who shares many of Trump's cultural grievances and his xenophobic intuitions but could wrap himself in the flag, in the rhetoric of patriotism, in the dangers that lurk beyond our borders?

Indeed, if I had to rank the most unsettling moments of the past year, high on my list would be press secretary Sarah Huckabee Sanders's rejoinder to a journalist who asked about a baldfaced lie Kelly had told. "If you want to get into a debate with a four-star Marine general, I think that that's something highly inappropriate," she said. That is how democracies die.


I just finished reading a young adult historical novel, The Devil in Vienna. It was about a Jewish girl's experience in Vienna around the time Hitler was coming to power, based largely on the author's own experiences. And no, things are nowhere near that bad, yet, and hopefully won't ever be, but the parallels are deeply disturbing - extreme patriotism, nearly religious reverence for the flag, scapegoating a minority group, the authoritarian leader discrediting and interfering with legitimate government agencies, the cult of personality around that leader. When you see the direction our country is headed, and look at what has happened in history when other countries have gone down that path, it will make you very, very scared for the possible future of the U.S. Let's just hope the Democrats do well in the next election.

Tuesday, December 5, 2017

The Big Christmas Post, 2017

Christmas TreeIt's the first full week of December, so I figure it's a good time to kick off the Christmas season with a blog post. I've written quite a few Christmas related entries over the years, and posted various comics and memes. So this year, I decided to gather up all the best stuff into one post - mostly with links, but with a bit of content in this entry. I know this is recycling, but it's still good stuff, especially if you've never read it before.

 

Jolly Posts

AOPA Christmas Card A Plane Christmas Greeting
This is a poem written by my late Uncle Bud. We both shared a love of aviation. This is his version of "The Night Before Christmas" (or "A Visit from St. Nicholas" for you pedants), with an aviation twist.
  
Koch Fractal Snowflakes An Early Christmas Present - Koch Snowflake Christmas Ornament 3D Printer STL Files
This is a brand new post this year. I played around with making snowflake ornaments for my 3D printer. But since I'm a nerd, they couldn't be any old snowflakes. These are fractal snowflakes.
  
White Wine in the Sun Merry Secular Christmas 2017 - Buy White Wine in the Sun, Support Autism Society
I have a tradition of posting a video of this song every year around Christmas. This year was no exception. Go give it a listen, and donate to the National Autistic Society while you're at it.

 

Curmudgeonly Posts

Santa in the Crosshairs War on Christmas
This was my first War on Christmas post. It covers a bit of the history of Christmas in the U.S. ("a nightmarish cross between Halloween and a particularly violent, rowdy Mardi Gras"), the Pagan origins of so many modern Christmas traditions, and in general why it's silly to get upset over an imagined War on Christmas.
  
Santa is no more Yes, Virginia, There Are Liars
I've never particularly liked lying to kids about Santa Claus, nor the whole mindset around Christmas time that kids should suppress their doubts and critical thinking skills. Playing pretend with kids is one thing, but lying is something else.
  
Scrooge When Happy Holidays Isn't Good Enough
This was an incident a few years ago that still stands out in my mind - a Salvation Army worker getting physically punched for wishing somebody a 'happy holidays' instead of a 'merry Christmas'. I included a meme that shows the appropriate response to any holiday greeting.

 

Should I Donate to _____ Charity?

Since so many people start thinking about donating to charity around the holidays, here are a couple entries on charities.

Salvation Army? The Salvation Army - To Give, or Not to Give?
As much as they try to portray a completely wholesome image, the Salvation Army isn't without their controversies. I'm not actually going to advocate that you do or don't donate to them (but if you don't, please donate to somebody else), but you should at least understand some of the activities they engage in that you may not agree with.
  
Charity Debunking an E-mail on Charities
This was written in reply to one of those email forwards, decrying all the supposed waste from certain charities, and suggesting you donate your charity money to other, more worthwhile charities. Well, suffice it to say, since it was an email forward, it wasn't particularly reliable. Granted, it's been a few years since I've looked into each of these charities, but it still gives you a sense of how legitimate various charities are, and provides links to a few watchdog groups.

 

Christmas Memes & Comics

You may have to click to embiggen to read this one.
Calamities of Nature Comic on Charlie Brown Christmas
Source: Calamities of Nature (via the WayBack Machine)

 

Santa Jesus Meme
Source: Master Marf (no idea if that's the original creator)

 


Source: Meme GeneratorMeme Generator

 

Christmas Tree Image Source: Free christmas Tree Backgrounds

An Early Christmas Present - Koch Snowflake Christmas Ornament 3D Printer STL Files

Koch Fractal SnowflakesI've had a 3D printer for a little while, now. While I mostly experiment with printing out various concept aircraft, I figured that for Christmas, I'd print a few Christmas ornaments. But with me being the nerd I am, I couldn't just print out any old random ornament. It had to be something a bit nerdier. So, after reading a post on Scientific American Blogs, A Few of My Favorite Spaces: The Koch Snowflake - A look at the most festive fractal, I was inspired to print a few tangible interpretations of the fractal. And I've shared the STL files below, for anybody else who might want to make them.

But first, here's a really cool animated gif from that Scientific American article, originally from Wikimedia Commons, showing the development of this fractal.

Koch Snowflake Fractal
Image Source: Wikimedia Commons, Credit: Ant├│nio Miguel de Campos

And here are the STL files. I've put a preview of each model. Clicking on the thumbnail will show a higher resolution image. To download the STL, use the actual download link.

Koch Snowflake 1 Preview Download Koch_Snowflake_1.STL
  
Koch Snowflake 1 Preview Download Koch_Snowflake_2.STL
  
Koch Snowflake 1 Preview Download Koch_Snowflake_3.STL

And here's a photo of the completed products.

Koch Snowflake Ornaments
Click to embiggen

Monday, December 4, 2017

Merry Secular Christmas 2017 - Buy White Wine in the Sun, Support Autism Society

In a yearly tradition for this blog, it's time to post one of my favorite Christmas songs, White Wine in the Sun, by Tim Minchin. But more than that, this is a chance to support the National Autistic Society. For the past several years, Minchin has donated all procedes from sales of the song around Christmas time to the National Autistic Society (more info). So, if you don't own a copy of the song, yet, now's a perfect time to buy it. And if you do already own a copy, you can always go to the National Autistic Society and donate directly.

If you've never heard the song, there's a description on Minchin's site from 2010, "This is a captivating song and a beautiful and intelligent exploration of why Christmas can still be meaningful even without religious beliefs. There's just the right amount of sentiment and some very gentle humour illustrating Tim's feelings about Christmas and the importance of family and home. It is a heart-warming song and may make you a little bright eyed."

So, with all that out of the way, here it is, White Wine in the Sun:

If you want to sing along, here are the lyrics.

Friday, October 13, 2017

Understanding Evolution - The Big Picture of Geologic Time

This entry is part of a collection on Understanding Evolution. For other entries in this collection, follow that link.


Geological Time SpiralThe Earth is old. Very old. You may have heard that it's 4.5 billion years old. But 4.5 may not sound like a huge number. The United States federal budget is nearly $4,000 billion. That's a bigger number than 4.5 billion, and it's something the government deals with on a yearly basis. So how old can 4.5 billion years really be?

This is the problem. Us humans aren't very good at dealing with really big or really small numbers. We're good at dealing with things on a human scale, whether it's size or age. When it gets to things that fall outside that range, we have a hard time wrapping our heads around it.

One of the better analogies I've seen is to imagine compressing 4.5 billion years down into one year, and then looking at how long things would take at that time scale. (It's not a big difference, but let's use a 365 day year, not a leap year.)

Let's start off by calibrating ourselves to something we're used to. Count to 1 second. That's 150 years - twice an average lifetime. If you're close to 40 like me, you only need to count to a third of a second to account for your entire life. Learning to walk, ride a bike, drive, my first job, my wedding day, watching my daughter grow up and graduate from high school. That all fits into 0.3 seconds in our compressed timescale.

For a slightly longer calibration point, let's go back to a big milestone - 1 AD. Well, maybe that's only a big milestone in hindsight since nobody at the time was actually changing their calendars, but it's still a number we can relate to - 2016 years ago. In our compressed calendar, that would have been a mere 14.13 seconds ago.

Keep those numbers in mind - 0.3 seconds for 40 years, 1 second for 150 years, or 14 seconds for 2000 years.

Okay, so now let's start going through the calendar. Keep in mind that a lot of these time periods and dates aren't known exactly, so in our 4.5 billion year year, they may have really been a few days or even weeks earlier or later.


Days 1 - 41, January 1 - Febrauary 10 (4.5 - 4.0 BYA)
Protoplanetary DiscFor the first 40 days or so, there wasn't much recognizable as the Earth as we know it. The cloud of dust and debris around the sun would have coalesced into the protoplanetary disc, with clumps forming and sticking together, until eventually some of the clumps got big enough to be early planets. Some time during this period, when the 'Earth' wasn't quite as big as it is now, it collided with another early planet about the size of Mars. This was a gargantuan impact, throwing out huge amounts of debris, some which coalesced to form the moon.


Days 41 - 57, February 11 - February 26 (4.0 - 3.8 BYA)
There were still a lot of asteroids out there at this point, so for roughly another two weeks, the Earth continued to get pummeled by these bodies, in what's known as the Late Heavy Bombardment.

Some time during those two weeks, the very first life got started. It would have been comparatively very simple, and certainly single celled. It would have been the type of life now known as prokaryotes - the archaea and bacteria. For the next 5 months or so, until August 3rd, these archaea and bacteria will reign supreme as the only type of life on the planet. Of course, they were evolving - replicating, mutating, and adapting, but they remained prokaryotes.

By the way, there was no oxygen in the atmosphere, yet. All the bacteria and archaea alive at this point are anaerobic.


Day 122, May 2 (3.0 BYA)

CyanobateriaCyanobacteria evolved. Forms of photosynthesis had evolved much earlier, but cyanobacteria evolved a new, more efficient method that created oxygen as a byproduct. Since oxygen is so reactive, at first any oxygen these cyanobacteria created would have reacted with iron to make rust. There was a lot of iron for the oxygen to react with, so for a while yet, there still wouldn't be much oxygen in the atmosphere. Until...


Day 163, June 12 (2.5 BYA)

The Great Oxygenation Event. Once all the free iron on Earth had reacted with the oxygen that cyanobacteria were making, there was nothing left to capture that oxygen, and it built up in the atmosphere very rapidly. But because oxygen is so reactive, it was actually poisonous to many organisms that hadn't evolved to handle it (antioxidants are still important even for us oxygen breathers - we don't want extra, unaccounted for oxygen running amock in our cells). This probably caused the first mass extinction on Earth (though it doesn't get as much press as other mass extinction events since no multi-cellular life was involved).


Day 215, August 3 (1.85 BYA)

YeastEukaryotes evolved. Okay, if you don't read about biology as much as me (or actual biologists), you may not know what a eukaryote is. They're the types of organisms that have a nucleus in their cells, and store all their DNA in chromosomes in that nucleus. They also have 'organelles', specialized little parts inside their cells with specific functions. One of the most famous is mitochondria, so often referred to as 'cellular powerhouses' for making the ATP that powers the rest of the cell. Amazingly, the most likely way this happened was symbiosis - a type of bacteria that would eventually become the mitochondria living alongside/inside some other species.

By the way, we're eukaryotes ourselves, but it will still be a while before we appear in this calendar.


Day 301, October 28 (800 MYA)

The first multicellular life appeared. Colonies of eukaryotes (and prokaryotes) would have been around before this, but these were the first eukaryotes to nudge past the distinction between a colony of clones and a group of clones considered a single organism.


Day 318 - 325, November 14 - November 21 (580 - 505 MYA)

Cambrian ExplosionThis was the famed Cambrian 'Explosion'. But it barely counts as an explosion even in our compressed calendar. Remember that in reality, this period lasted some 75 million years. It was during this time that complex multicellular life evolved, and branched out into many of the major groups that are still around. Granted, most of these organisms would have looked fairly primitive, but there at least would have been organisms big enough for a person to see with their naked eye (assuming you had a time machine), and recognizable as animals.


Day 326, November 22 (485 MYA)

Early FishThe first vertebrates with actual bones evolved, the jawless fishes. These jawless fish would eventually give rise to all the vertebrates alive today.


Day 330, November 26 (434 MYA)

The first land plants evolved. These first plants wouldn't have been particularly impressive, probably looking more like lichens. But over the coming ages, they would evolve more and more traits that benefitted their terrestrial lives.


Day 336, December 2 (363 MYA)

CarboniferousWell, it's the second day of the last month of our Earth history year. And by now, the Earth finally looks fairly recognizable. There are sharks and other fish swimming in the ocean, insects crawling around on land, feeding on plants with stems and leaves. It's round about this time that the first tetrapods took to the land. Sure, there are many types of plants and animals that haven't yet appeared, but if you went back in a time machine, you wouldn't feel like you were on a completely alien world.


Day 340, December 6 (320 MYA)
This was when some species of animals split into two, one of whose descendants would go on to become the synapsids (which includes us), and one of which would go on to become the sauropsids, which includes lizards and birds. But at the time, those two sister species would still have looked practically identical.


Day 343, December 9 (280 MYA)
The first seed-bearing plants evolved.


Day 347, December 13 (225 MYA)
The first dinosaurs evolved sometime around now, and just a few million years later (no more than a day or two in this compressed calendar), the first mammals also evolved. For the time being, both remained rather minor groups of animals, with therapsids and non-dinosaur archosaurs being the most dominant land animals for now.


Day 349, December 15 (200 MYA)
A mass extinction occurred, killing off most of the synapsids. After today, the dinosaurs would diversify and come to dominate the planet. Mammals still remained small.


Day 353, December 19 (155 MYA)
Archaeopteryx - Berlin SpecimenThis may not be the most significant event in the history of the planet, but it's one I'm interested in personally - Archaeopteryx evolved. And since Archaeopteryx was either one of the first birds, or a very close relative of the first birds, it was right around this time that birds evolved.


Day 355, December 21 (130 MYA)
Flowers evolved. Just think about that. We're two thirds of the way through December, and the first flowers are just now appearing.


Day 360, December 26 (65 MYA)
K-Pg Impact EventA gigantic asteroid collided with the Earth, causing a massive explosion and cataclysmic devastation on the planet. With only a few exceptions, no land animals over 50 lbs survived. All of the non-bird dinosaurs went extinct, though plenty of bird species were wiped out, as well. In fact, species from pretty much every major branch of life went extinct - mammals, marine reptiles, insects, plants, fish, all the pterosaurs, etc. In the wake of this devastation, the remaining mammals would diversify to become the dominant large animals on land.


Day 365, December 31, 12:00 noon (6 MYA)
ProconsulOn noon of the last day of our compressed year, an ancient species of ape split into two species. The descendants of one of those species would remain in the forests, and eventually give rise to chimpanzees and bonobos. The descendants of the other would gradually move out to the savannahs, eventually giving rising to us - but not for a little while, yet.


Day 365, December 31, 11:48 pm (100,000 YA)
Modern humans appeared about a quarter of an hour till midnight. This gets a little into semantics on which of our ancestors you're willing to say are 'human' vs. 'pre-human', so give or take a few minutes here to allow for the fuzziness of this transition.


Day 365, December 31, 11:58:50 pm (10,000 YA)
The first human civilizations started some time around now.


Day 365, December 31, 11:59:25 pm (5,000 YA)
Early WritingThe famous ball in times square is about halfway through its drop, and humans have just developed writing.


Day 365, December 31, 11:59:46 pm (2,016 YA)
The year 1 AD.


Day 366, January 1, 12:00 midnight (Now)
And now, at the stroke of midnight, we've reached the present day.


So, it may seem like things really started accelerating there towards the end of the year, but that's mostly due to our own bias of being more interested in those particular events, and the bias of the geologic record in containing more younger fossils and artifacts than older ones. Just as much was happening 100 million years ago as a few thousand years ago, just without us humans around to see it.

And even if it seems like a lot was happening in a few mere days, recall what these time scales really mean. On this condensed calendar, a human lifespan is less than a second. The last two millenia were a mere 13 seconds, and all of humanity's time on Earth is no more than a few minutes*. Start counting out seconds, trying to imagine entire generations passing with each count, to get an idea of just how vast these timescales are. Then, try to imagine continuing that count for a whole day, and just how much time that really represents. And then, think back to what you were doing a year ago, and how many seconds have passed since that moment, and maybe you'll start to get an idea of how long 4.5 billion years really is.

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*To be fair, most species haven't been around very long on a geologic scale, even if humanity is a bit on the young side. Species last maybe a million years or so before either going extinct, or evolving into something else. Life is constantly changing and adapting.

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